Focus On The Family
How To Get Divorced Without Destroying Your Children’s Lives
Divorce can be an experience that is incredibly detrimental to the welfare of children. Indeed, even the way we use to describe divorce suggests emotional damage. We say that the child is from a broken home and it makes a lot of sense. If you have two people who love and care about you when you’re young, and then one leaves, it’s a change. It’s something that the child or children simply weren’t expecting. It can be a shock to the system, and this is why there are so many reports condemning parents who get a divorce for seemingly silly reasons. But, the damage of divorce doesn’t mean you should avoid the option altogether. There are ways to make sure that a divorce doesn’t impact on your kids.
Make It Amicable
The best thing that you can do if you want a divorce is to sit down with your partner and explain why. You should probably make sure that your children are out the house when you do this. There is no way of knowing how your partner will react. Hopefully, if there are problems with the marriage they have noticed them too.
No one wants to stay in a relationship that simply isn’t working. If you can, you need to make the split amicable and ensure it doesn’t become a battlefield. In some cases, this will be unavoidable because one of you will take a hostile stance. At this point, the best thing you can do is agree to keep the kids out of it.
Explain It In A Way That Kids Understand
How you approach the divorce will depend on the age of your child. If your children are older, you might be tempted to explain to them why you need a divorce. It can be comforting to know that you have the support of your children because a spouse has cheated. However, you should avoid this temptation and let them remain neutral. You don’t want them picking sides because that will be incredibly stressful for them. For younger children, it’s best to keep the divorce as simple as possible. However, you must realize that children are always going to notice the change.
Find A Divorce Lawyer Who Cares
Divorce lawyers are often referred as being both heartless and cruel. Their job, the media claims, is to get the biggest payout possible for each party. Most divorce lawyers know all about the effect that the proceeding can have on children. A caring lawyer will do everything possible to keep your cared for throughout the divorce. They will not and should not use your children as an argumental weapon or leverage. If this happens, a divorce can have toxic consequences for kids.
Focus On The Family
Finally, the best way to coping with a divorce is to think of it as the end of the relationship, not the family. A father is still part of the family even if he leaves. A mother is still connected to the children, even if she does remarry. Instead of ending, the family should extend with new members who accept the situation. It takes time for all the pieces to slot into place but if you are patient and forgiving they will. When that happens, your children will be safe from the issues typically associated with a divorce.